Thursday, October 2, 2008

Reliving the Past

I'm going through all of the boys' baby clothes, sending a bunch to a friend in Florida and giving the winter stuff to Will's mom. What started as a simple sorting chore turned into a kind of emotional experience.

I thought I'd be able to just put everything in their respective boxes and then ship it all off. Not so.

How about the picture in my mind of teeny-Eenie in his little striped baby bag all nestled in the pack-n-play in the living room of our old house? What about that time I took a picture of him in the little overalls and puppy-dog shirt in the hallway with Bryan holding him up just before we went to introduce him to my co-workers when he was 2 weeks old? How about the "Future Mr. Right" onesie that Chase wore in the hospital that was funny and cute--- but bittersweet in my crazed after-the-diagnosis-state---? Or the "Not Too Little to Giggle" shirt that I got in 2 sizes just because I liked the message when Chase wore it?

How about the 9-12 month clothes that were a little big on Chase last winter but still fit him now? Guess I'll put those right back in his drawer.

I'm stashing the stuff I can't part with in boxes headed for the attic. I'm not ready to let those things go yet.

Meanwhile, I'll box up the rest of it all while I cry...tears of happiness and sadness, of joy and thanks, and of frustration. God, I'm a mess.


Tiffanyrose said...

How ironic that you are doing that over there. I am doing the EXACT same thing over here. It feels like all the little girl clothes are just sitting there waiting to be used again.

LeShayne said...

Aw...that is hard! I even get all sentimental when I see a picture that has Ian wearing something that Tristan wore. I love that though.

I save those things and have cut them into various sized squares and started a crazy quilt for each kid. It includes pcs from outfits they wore on major holidays, first days of school, when taking first steps, coming home from the hospital, etc. I hope to keep at it little by little through the years and have them done for their wedding days. That way it will have stuff from first dates, graduation, swim meets, soccer games, first jobs, etc too.

Jen said...

I've been doing the same thing. I find myself setting aside certain things to save, but really, for what? To take up space? Sometimes it's hard to let go of those memories, and hard to realize that even though I never, ever, ever want to be pregnant or have a newborn again, I've seen the last of my babies outgrow these little outfits. Hard.

Mandi said...

I'm glad you're keeping some things. My mom didn't save anything and i wish i could go back and see some of the things i wore when i was young. I love the idea of a quilt though- how greate will it be when they are able to wrap THEIR children in that quilt. Great idea, LaShayne!