Friday, May 14, 2010

Chase Advice

Right now I am taking a Mommy Time Out.  Here is my dilemma:

Chase is doing great in school, but is using up all his good behavior on his teachers.  He is coming home, and causing every kind of trouble he can cause from 2:30-6:00.  He is swiping things off counter tops, taking toys from the other kids, pushing Gavin down, pulling Gavin's shirt, throwing his cup, throwing his food, throwing his toys, throwing the blocks.

I've tried time outs, natural consequences, and even a swat on the butt.  Reward systems don't work for him yet.  He doesn't have the ability to understand that concept yet.  I try to positively reinforce the good behavior, but it seems like the positive stuff during the afternoons is very VERY rare.

I hate this.  I hate that I don't see him all day, and when I do, he is acting like a hellion, and then I am disciplining him all afternoon.  And not only that, poor Guy Guy is being beat up.  So frustrating.

I know he is overtired.  He hardly ever naps at school, and when he gets home, he refuses to go down.  I left him in his room today for about a half hour, and he played for a while and then started beating the door with a Little Person.

So, short of serving dinner at 3pm and putting him to bed at 4, what do I do?  Drugs?  Alcohol?  Get a nanny from 2:30-6 every day?  Is anyone else having this problem?  Is it 'normal' for him to need a 2 hour nap every day still?  Halp!


marycsuds said...

Oh Laurie! It is sooooooo normal! And boy, do I remember those days... I used to actually dread picking my son up from preschool. From the moment he got in the car he became a little monster! And yes, they definitely still need LOOONG naps at that age. (Or maybe it's us who need them, but I digress...) My suggestion is to find a way to give him quiet, independent time when he gets home. Pop in a favorite video and just let him chill. They have to be so "on" while they're at school. The transition is hard, especially at first. "This too shall pass." Hang in there, and keep a steady supply of Margaritas in the house! :)

Dawn said...

Jake still has a melt down everyday when he gets home and he is kindergarten. It is such an early day and long too. I find that part of his problem is that they have lunch at 10:20 so that by the time he gets home at 2:15PM, he is a demon b/c he is so hungry. I have to give him a very hearty snack (almost a meal)when he gets home.

This might sound dreaded but could you experiment with shortening his day? Maybe pick him up during the nap time? I wonder what he would miss after nap though.

Chris said...

I just emailed John's teacher about the throwing! It is driving me crazy. I don't know if he likes the sound of things hitting the ground or he just digs destruction! I don't think he is too young to still need a nap. John still takes a nap--some days he won't sleep, but I force the issue. I agree with Mary--find away to give him some down time--and pray he falls asleep. Oh, and if the margarita's don't work, shots of tequila might do the trick.

Cammie Howard said...

Hmmmm...that does not sound like fun. I do not have any advice. I will just say you are a good mom and remind you that in James 1:5, God promises to give us wisdom when we ask! I will pray that for you Laurie.Hang in there!

jessica said...

Both my girls were still taking 2 hour naps at age 4+. If you can't get him down, i'd do quiet time. We had the girls lay in my bed or on the couch and watch a movie. sometimes they'd fall asleep, sometimes not. But at least they can unwind a little. The school transition is so hard at 5, at three it's got to be even harder!

mom said...

How about removing everything he can throw before he comes home? Hide it in the play romm, lock that room off. Ian has a stash of things to do in his room, and Gavin is happy just to have your attention. Leave out a few soft toys, close the shades, and have a movie on when he comes home. Everybody can use a time out with a snack. Hopefully he will crash.

I remember a little girl whose father left her in the car after preschool, she was soooo crabby...!

Anne said...

Can you adjust his school schedule at all so he can sleep at home? Nick needed a good nap until he was 5. The first two years he was in school he technically was supposed to be there at least 4 hours but could stay 6. I found that he just didn't nap at school but napped really well at home, so I'd just pick him up after lunch. He didn't really miss much because they really just napped and did afternoon circle.