Friday, June 20, 2008


Blech. I've just been feeling tired. used up. stretched too thin. I know I have a million things to do, but really, I just don't feel like doing them. Between all the have to's and need to's, I feel like there isn't enough time for the want to's. And if I do the stuff I want to do (play with the kids), all the other shit just piles up behind me like some crappy monster following me around.

My Have To-Do List:
Laundry (Ian is on his last pair of underwear today)
General picking the crap up around the house
Kitchen (You know when the dishwasher is clean, so plates/pans get all piled up everywhere because there is nowhere to put them?)
Bills (sitting on the counter. Wonder which ones are late?)
Thank you cards from Chase's birthday (yes, it was in April.)
Father's Day card for Bryan's Dad...still sitting here on the counter...
Call Geico and get the new van on the insurance
Go to the Aquatic Center and sign Ian up for the next swim lessons
Therapies all over the place (+ Chase's PT eval on Monday)
Dr appts (ENT today at 2 for Chase's follow up, eye dr on Monday for Chase-- notice a pattern?)
Watching Logan today for 12 hours...(he was here at 6am- ack. early.)
Grocery shopping (out of all juice right now, getting close to being out of milk)

My Should Do's:
Dr appts for me. I've been putting things off for a long time. I need to see the optomitrist (tired of wearing my glasses and I've been out of contacts for like 3 months). I also was due for my annual at the OB/GYN last September (oops. and sorry, TMI. but this is my blog and you can stop reading if you want.) And it's been like 4 years since I went to the dermatologist, who I'm supposed to see every 6 months because of my fair and cancer-prone complexion, so I probably have some sort of cancer now. And speaking of every 6 months, I still haven't been to the dentist since I fired the last one.

My Want To's:
Actually, these are not so much want to do things, since it's all about playing with my kids. Well, and exercising for me. But what the hell? If I stay at home, I should be able to play with my kids all day long, right? I feel like I'm always trading something, promising something, if I do this, then we can do that. If you eat breakfast, then we'll play puzzles. If I get the toilets scrubbed, then we'll go outside. Well, f*ck! If I keep waiting til everything else happens, then we'll never do anything fun!

I don't know what I'm going to do about this. If I was a good person, I would write everything down on something with a dry erase marker, or make a chart or a big long list to stick on my front door. Maybe I would stop freaking blogging about it and actually get up and accomplish something. But I won't. I'll sit here with my coffee and wait for the PT to knock on my door. Then after therapy maybe I'll get in a shower. Then I'll get all the kids fed/cleaned/changed/napped. Then I'll futz around the house with Ian while the little guys sleep. Then we'll go to the ENT. Maybe the store because I don't want to hear the whining about juice again tomorrow morning. Then we'll come home and not do anything until dinner time. Then I will have a glass of wine and feel crappy about all the stuff I haven't done and go to bed.

This turned into a really uplifting post, didn't it? Damn.

How does everyone else do it?


Jen said...

Just like you do it. Futzing around the house, blogging, and making promises I can't keep while we run out of juice and underwear and fuzzy stuff starts growing in the toilets. Let me know if you figure it out!

Jen said...

Oh, and if you're even THINKING about scrubbing toilets, you're doing a much better job at this than me.

Angelle said...

You know I was in that same funk last week. It comes and goes. I swear to you though, that chore chart is my lifeline when I get like that. When I accomplish my chores for that day, I feel better about myself. It is such a confidence booster.

Chris said...

Hey, those lists look very similar to mine!

I think if you get food in the house, clean underwear for your kids and insurance on your car, you are in good shape.

What if you prioritize your three lists. Then do one thing from each list so each of the lists get equal attention?

Gotta run--you reminded me that my older daughter is out of clean underwear--thankfully, she was able to squeeze herself into a pair of her little sisters. I need juice too, and need to make a dentist appt for myself, and OB/GYN--of course I need to find new first.

Would it be bad to start the day with the glass of wine ;)

Grace said...

I have no clue what you are talking about. I get up ever day and hit the gym for an hour,do all my laundry,make all the beds,scrub the floors and bathroom, pack lunches and thats all before 8am.I read stories with the boys,take the kids to the park and we have family fun hour with no tv or video games.How could someone ever waste time on the computer??

***seriously I can't even type anymore cause I am laughing so freaking hard***

LeShayne said...

I don't have much help for you - just some encouragement! ITS GET BETTER!!!!

Really those are the sentiments that we all feel with little kids at some points. And then they grow up a little more and you survive and move on the next phase and things are just as busy but its new and different and so it seems easier. And then when you can't take that anymore you hit a new phase.

I agree that you need to prioritize your lists and go from there...I used to break things up by time periods too. Like I would give myself a half hour in the morn to have coffee and plan my day...then before lunch time was the need to do list like laundry, grocery shopping, etc...if the kids were not happy playing on their own nearby then they helped put stuff in the washer, or stack tupperware from the dishwasher, etc. After lunch was play time...then when they took naps (they took late naps) I made phone calls...then after they woke up it was family time and at night - I know this is not a popular opinion - but I would have Todd help. Yeah he worked all day but heck so did I. I did not ask him to do huge things but those little things - watching tv together while folding towels or paying bills online - saved me lots of time during the day!!!

Not sure if any of that helps but just remember it gets easier. Not too long from now Ian will be able to help you sort laundry, put away silverware, wash the table, etc...those little things that make a big difference.

Melanie said...

You are funny! But I know it is not funny...good luck. I just run around like mad when I get a rare burst of energy and I am NEVER caught up. I tried the white board and list thing...lasted one day. Just play with those cute kids and don't worry too much. The kids don't care that the house doesn't look perfect.

Mom said...

When we packed up to move to NC, I discovered, with 80% of my "stuff" in a storage shed, life just got easier! Fewer kitchen items, fewer books on shelves...fewer shelves!, fewer clothes, fewer papers, etc. I am not really missing any of it!

OK, it is one more thing to do, but do it in tiny increments:

Fill and label a trash bag (opaque, so the kids can't identify toys, a trick I used to "hide" stuff!) or box and stash it somewhere. One each time as you tidy up the house. Keep out only what is used most often.

Tip: if it is a "Goodwill" bag, put it in the car for a quick toss in the nearest goodwill bin. Resist the urge to have a garage sale!!

Even old towels and sheets are welcome at animal shelters - bag'em and stash in car for delivery.

Do not save socks with holes: you will NEVER get around to sewing them!

You will see:
Less toys to pick up at the end of the day.
More room in the overflowing dresser drawers.
Nothing on the kitchen counters! Because they fit in the cabinets, now!
Room in your linen closets!

Aren't you excited, now?

This may take years, but even small progress is progress!

Alyssa said...

LOL! That made me laugh!